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Literature Text
Cake
This is my cake.
This is my cheesecake.
This is my bloody birthday cheesecake.
But I can’t have any.
Why?
I spent the last week on a massive sugar high.
Why?
I had to try and short-circuit my brain chemistry.
Why?
I had to be as numb as possible to the outside world.
Why?
I had to remain functional for as long as possible.
Why?
Others needed me to be strong enough so that they could lean on me.
Why?
A friend just died. He was my age. We buried him yesterday.
It’s not even my birthday today, anyway. It’s tomorrow.
We’re just doing everything today because there’ll be no time tomorrow.
Everyone has things to do.
So I go from burying a friend to having a party.
Maybe I’ll have a piece tomorrow.
If there’s any left.
This is my cake.
This is my cheesecake.
This is my bloody birthday cheesecake.
But I can’t have any.
Why?
I spent the last week on a massive sugar high.
Why?
I had to try and short-circuit my brain chemistry.
Why?
I had to be as numb as possible to the outside world.
Why?
I had to remain functional for as long as possible.
Why?
Others needed me to be strong enough so that they could lean on me.
Why?
A friend just died. He was my age. We buried him yesterday.
It’s not even my birthday today, anyway. It’s tomorrow.
We’re just doing everything today because there’ll be no time tomorrow.
Everyone has things to do.
So I go from burying a friend to having a party.
It even feels wrong.
Maybe I’ll have a piece tomorrow.
If there’s any left.
I did this up during a rather rough period of time, and found it while going through the disk I had it on.
A friend of mine died under tragic circumstances, and his body was found the Sunday before Thanksgiving and eight days before my birthday.
I spent the next week short-circuiting my brain chemistry in an effort to force myself into feeling numb so that everyone else (pretty much everyone who knew him was shocked or devastated to some degree) could have someone to lean on.
Thing is, I had family coming down for the holiday.
Thus, I had all of four hours from the time I got back home from the funeral to the time that they arrived in order to get myself back on track and restore some level of functionality.
I needed four days.
Guess what I didn't get?
A friend of mine died under tragic circumstances, and his body was found the Sunday before Thanksgiving and eight days before my birthday.
I spent the next week short-circuiting my brain chemistry in an effort to force myself into feeling numb so that everyone else (pretty much everyone who knew him was shocked or devastated to some degree) could have someone to lean on.
Thing is, I had family coming down for the holiday.
Thus, I had all of four hours from the time I got back home from the funeral to the time that they arrived in order to get myself back on track and restore some level of functionality.
I needed four days.
Guess what I didn't get?
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